Shit Show Extravaganza

Oh my. What a difference a week makes, huh? Last week we were discussing about how far up the Sabres were going to climb up in the standings and we had a superhero disguised as a tall & lanky goalie in net for us. Now people are talking about which golf courses select Sabres are going to be teeing off at come April and we've got some 11 year old Swedish kid in net for us. Oh, hockey. You and your rollercoaster of emotions that you make me ride. Thanks to stupid sprained ankles, lame broken jaws, bum groins, stomach flus, old age, and good old fashioned laziness & stupidity, it's really hard to tell where this team is at.

Well last night can be summed up in one word...disappointing. I have to say the highlight of my night was sitting next to a guy who was eating a banana. It might quite possibly be the first and last time that I'll ever see someone eating a banana at a hockey game. As for the game itself...well, I don't think they looked awful. At times they did. But for the most part I thought they were pretty defensively sound, but those gaffes between the sound play is what will kill you. That terrible turnover at the very beginning of the game and the shorthanded goal comes to mind. I think the shorty is what really killed us. They never recovered from it. Now everyone is so quick to blame Lalime. Hold your horses, everyone. First goal came from a breakaway due to an awful turnover, second goal was deflected, and the third goal went off of Gaustad's skate. Now is that to say Lalime gets a free pass? Of course not. But to lay the blame all on him is ignorant. To me, it looks like a sorry excuse and it's easy to simply make Lalime our scapegoat. I think fans need to realize that Lalime isn't Ryan Miller. He isn't going to be stealing many games for us like Ryan can, and maybe he isn't going to bail out his team after they make costly mistakes as much as Ryan will. It is what it is. He's our backup goalie, not a bonafide starting goaltender like Miller.

So yeah, our goaltending situation at the moment certainly isn't ideal. But it gets better! It seems as though Lalime won't be playing tomorrow night against Carolina because he's come down with the flu. So we've got our little Swedish friend (who by the way looked surprisingly small in the warmups last night) in goal for us. So who's our backup goalie? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? The goaltending situation in Portland seems to be as troublesome as ours at the moment, considering they've been riding Enroth up until he got called up, so if they can't find a decent goalie in the AHL, then where does that leave us? When it rains it pours.

Remember the good old days when we had a really awesome goalie in net for us that threw really cool themed parties and resembled Jesus when he would skip shaving for a few days? Remember when we had a cool Austrian top-scorer who's mouth wasn't wired shut? Ahh yes, nostalgia. So while having both your top-scorer and franchise goaltender injured at the same time is a recipe for disaster isn't ideal, can the Sabres suck it up? It's not like their next opponent is one point behind them in the standings or anything. Or that a loss against them would mean that we're bumped out of the playoffs. Nahhhh. No big deal.

I hope Ryan Miller's left ankle isn't getting any enjoyment out of all the attention it's receiving. Ryan better watch out, pretty soon his left ankle is going to be more popular than he is. It starts out pretty innocent. People will go up to Ryan and ask him how his ankle is, blah blah blah. But then pretty soon girls are going to be asking for its autograph. Kids will be wanting their picture with it. And then before you know, Ryan will be out at a bar and his left ankle is going to leave with more phone numbers than Ryan. So for the sake of Ryan's popularity, and for the sake of the Sabres fate, please heal quickly, Ryan's left ankle. Please? We all miss Ryan so stop being a little bitch and heal for him. Ryan's left ice skate misses you.